A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
