ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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