She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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