just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
