I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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