it hurts more in the daytime
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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