Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
