i barfeds in our rink
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
Randomize
