Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Randomize
