I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Randomize
