I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
