Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry Tanya182 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(323): View more from California

just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo

Fav 2 833 1186
share tweet
(225): View more from Louisiana

Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt

Fav 17 2381 3423
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(405): View more from Oklahoma

also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?

Fav 27 6685 1697
share tweet
(660): View more from Missouri

Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...

Fav 12 4635 1363
share tweet
(347): View more from New York

drinking out of a sandbucket again

Fav 13 3344 1666
share tweet
(509): View more from Washington

Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.

Fav 10 6004 1995
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(845): View more from New York

I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.

Fav 5 3025 1277
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(613): View more from Ontario

wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck

(330): View more from Ohio

yes

Fav 2 110 4
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(303): View more from Colorado

The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat

Fav 0 6 64
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT