well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Boobs speak an international language.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
