just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
jump out the window naked night went bad
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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