just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
two words...techno handjob
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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