You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
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