Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
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