girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
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