my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
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