I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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