Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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