Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Randomize
