Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize
