I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
