Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Randomize
