so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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