I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
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