i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
