Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Randomize
