Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
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