another moral hangover. fuck.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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