Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
