Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
