Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
