marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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