he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
