Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
