cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
