I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
