Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
