dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
