I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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