If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
