my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
kristin has been a bad kristin
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Randomize
