I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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