I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
