My nipple is on Facebook.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
MIDGETS
????
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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