Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
