let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Randomize
