i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
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